By Nancy Coulter Beland, Owner of Starfish

It is hard to believe that we are here again already. The Holidays. Many people have commented as of late that their calendar pages just seem to have gotten caught in the wind. Time has flown too quickly this year. Or so it seems.

During the holiday season many of us often find ourselves stressed out. You would think that happy occasions aren’t stressful, but sometimes they can be even more stressful than the sad ones. There is so much to do. We pressure ourselves to find perfection in each other, our parties, decorations, meals, gifts and more.

Is there anything in life that is truly perfect? Of course there isn’t. Even the best-laid plans can run afowl. This year may be especially hard for many of us, given the serious issues facing us in the world and at home. I propose that we try to simplify things, accept less than perfection, let some things “be” and not stress ourselves. This should be a time of joyful memories, thanks giving and good company. It could, in fact, be your best holiday season yet.

Here are my 12 tips to un-stress your holidays:

1. Use lists and calendars to stay organized: try to plan ahead
2. Set attainable goals for decorating: keep to a budget; allow the children, or friends, to help (decorating parties can be a lot of fun)
3. Be realistic with your time and capabilities: do not be afraid to say no. Say yes only to the things you really can, and wish to, do.
4. Take 10 minutes for yourself each day: this could be meditation, a walk, reading time, a bubble bath, or prayer - the important thing is to relax and remember to keep breathing.
5. Are you hosting the dinner? Cook the main dish and let your guests bring the rest: either potluck style (let them volunteer their favorite dish) or with a menu (you assign the dish). Don’t be afraid to ask for help in arranging the food or setting the table.
6. Be flexible with timing: The world will not end if you eat at 4:30 instead of 4 and, if you know a guest is usually late, tell them your start time is 30 minutes earlier
7. Rent funny movies or show recent family videos to keep your guests occupied
8. Do your gift shopping over the Internet or by catalog: stick to your budget and avoid impulse buying: keep in mind that homemade gifts are often very well received and appreciated for the thought and time that went into them
9. If children are joining you for the holiday meal, use paper instead of cloth for their table and have water colors, washable markers or crayons for them to use
10. If a conversation is becoming stressful, excuse yourself and go for a short walk and try to remember that the only thing you can truly control is how you react or deal with something.
11. Music does soothe the savage beast: playing a variety of music can keep the mood light and festive
12. Don’t forget to take care of yourself: take your vitamins, keep your medical appointments, be sure your medications are filled, keep your gym/exercise schedule as close to the norm as you can

Stressed spelled backwards is desserts. Here’s to a sweet stress-free holiday season.
Nancy Beland is the owner of Starfish Resources: Making a difference for seniors and their families.